Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Archive for the ‘Tears’ Category

I love babies. They’re fragile and unaware. Not to mention, they’re us and who we used to be. A friend recently had a baby and I was invited to come visit, only hours after her little girl was born. I had been to visit babies, such as new cousins, at the hospital before but there was something different about this experience. Maybe because I’m getting older or because it was one of my peers’ babies but it really moved me. It moved me in a way that brought tears to my eyes and a sort of happiness and excitement that was so precious. Of course, I was super embarrassed because no one else was crying-not even the brand new mom or grandma. After laughing, apologizing the tears away and taking a few photos, I left the hospital feeling so calm. Content. Happy. I felt as if I had been recharged, ready for life and the challenges ahead of me. They say that “being born” and dying are the most painful and difficult experiences to endure (which I’d like to know how anyone knows that) and if this tender little human could handle being born and struggling into our world then we can persevere over our pain, struggles and conflicts.

Advertisements

Read Full Post »

My parents tried to introduce me to the idea of death and funerals at an early age. Their thought process was that if they treated the idea as normal and just a natural part of life than I wouldn’t think too much of it. The thing was-I had a mind of my own and it was filled with anxiety. For a long long long time I was terrified of death. Not just of my own mortality but my loved ones as well. Whenever I would leave my parents, uncles/aunts or grandma I would tell myself “This is going to be the last goodbye”. It was hell. I worked hard to change my thought process and thankfully I have learned to embrace the idea of death without crumbling at the very thought of it. Shirley MacLaine believes in reincarnation. I’m not sure if I do too but I do believe our souls never die and if that’s the case then we never die. War is pointless, if death doesn’t mean anything. The thing is our society wants us to fear death. They want us to be afraid so we buy things to make us feel like we’re cheating death-Earthquake survival kits, medicines, insurance policies, etc. Not to mention, a group that is afraid is easier to control than a group that is brave. My suggestion? Live live LIVE your life loud. In the end/beginning/transition, we are alone. Let’s embrace it and not be afraid anymore so are world can be healthier and happier!

Read Full Post »

Read whatever you want, just read! Listen to people’s perspectives, funny moments, horrifying experiences and beliefs. We all want to be heard but to truly be heard we also need to listen. It doesn’t matter if you agree, disagree, laugh, cry or feel nothing at all. What’s important is that you are active in the search to find something that sticks in your brain and not in your ass, hips or thighs. Junk is so frivolous, fleeting and fake. People consume that crap because they’re souls are hungry for nutrients. Nourish yourself. Read!

Read Full Post »

Growing up I loved to cry. No matter if they were fake or real tears, I felt as though it gave me so much power. Power to control what people could give me. A soccer coach that would end up not making me run as much because of my tears, a teacher so they wouldn’t yell at me about missing my homework or my parents so they wouldn’t ground me when that teacher called home about the missing homework. I did it to friends, boys I had crushes on, babysitters. It was obnoxious. I finally learned, somewhere in high school/college, what was happening. I was making myself look weak. Friends and my parents were beginning to treat me differently, as if I was fragile. That was the biggest insult and that’s all it took. I stopped crying. I stopped needing people. I stopped the damsel in distress phone calls. I pushed everyone I loved and that loved me away. I became tough. Serious. Independent. I felt so strong and as if I could accomplish anything for the first time in my life. However, as good as all of the newfound confidence felt, I still had an urge to cry. But, I suffocated it. I wouldn’t allow it. Even alone in my own room, I would fight against it. I didn’t want to be that girl. Awhile later, everyone began to mention to me how cold, guarded and isolated I was becoming. It wasn’t just the tears that were gone but my sensitivity towards others had been lost as ¬†well. A piece of me was gone. So, I started crying again. By myself and only in front of others sparingly. It felt so good to allow myself to be comforted, get out my frustration and sadness which then would allow me to leave it. Once the tears had escaped, I could move on. Strengthen and grow. So, cry. In the mirror to yourself, into a pillow or to a friend and then laugh at yourself for having so much pity for yourself.

Read Full Post »